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Iron Man 3

Movie Review: Iron Man 3

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Rating:
4 out of 5

To be a superhero these days, you have to be depressed. Mindlessly entertaining popcorn flicks about invincible caped crusaders didn’t used to bum me out, but ever since The Dark Knight, every superhero seems to be going through some sort of existential crisis. Just look at the upcoming slate of summer blockbusters: Pacific Rim, The Wolverine, After Earth, Man of Steel, and World War Z all feature heroes struggling with their own vulnerabilities while trying to survive a brutal (often post-apocalyptic) world. The new Star Trek movie even has the word “darkness” in its title. Things are bleak, folks.

So it goes with Tony Stark in the latest Iron Man film. Our usually puckish hero is still shaken by the events that unfolded in The Avengers, so much so that he can’t sleep, instead spending his nights obsessing over ways to keep his now live-in girlfriend Pepper Potts safe.  But there’s one thing that differentiates this franchise from all those other tortured superhero flicks: we’re supposed to find his angst hilarious. The more Tony (a self-described “piping hot mess”) spirals, the funnier this thing gets. It even plays his increasingly frequent panic attacks for laughs.

It works, mostly because Robert Downey Jr. still totally owns this role. Though he feels a bit less plugged in than in the previous Iron Man flicks, a slightly distant RDJ is still better than none at all.  It remains fascinating to watch the choices he makes. Take the scene below; other actors may have tried to wring more emotion out of his declaration of love for Pepper, but RJD’s casually tossed-off comment about protecting her lands harder than any tear-soaked speech. It echoes what he said about characters being too melodramatic in his recent GQ profile: “In movies people seem to be more emotional than they would ever be if that situation was actually happening to them.”

Also amping up the humour is the film’s dedication to upending our expectations. When a precious child sidekick enters the scene, you think it’s going to follow the tired little-kid-teaches-hero-about-himself trope. But Tony is having none of it. When the adorable moppet explains that his father went to the corner store to buy some “scratchers” six years ago and hasn’t been seen since, Tony barely lets him get the sob story out before cutting him off with an abrupt, “Dads leave. There’s no need to be a pussy about it.” And thanks to director Shane Black’s welcome attempts to keep Tony out of his iron suit as much as possible, a portion of the final action sequence plays out like a buddy cop movie, with Tony fumbling with a gun while struggling to keep up with Don Cheadle’s Colonel Rhodes.

Speaking of the action sequences, you’ve probably already seen the destruction of Tony’s palatial estate in the trailer which, while impressive, pales in comparison to the film’s thrilling mid-air rescue of 13 plummeting passengers that plays out like an acrobatic game of Barrel of Monkeys. Even Gwyneth Paltrow’s Pepper Potts gets in on some of the action, kicking butt and hinting at a possible future as a superhero herself.

The supporting cast mostly works, with Guy Pearce at his oily best as the main villain (though his character’s master plan for taking over the universe remains a confusing, glossed-over afterthought). Happy Endings’ Adam Pally threatens to steal the show as a Tony Stark groupie and he might have gotten away with it, it if weren’t for Ben Kingsley. Try not to read spoilers about his character; just sit back and enjoy the reveal. Because sitting back and enjoying it is what summer movies are all about. Just because the hero is depressed, it doesn’t mean we have to be.

Brad Pitt’s World War Z Cost $200 Million, Reshot Entire Ending

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Brad Pitt (well, mostly his teeth) covers Vanity Fair this month, and the article focuses on the “nightmare” production of World War Z. Is there any way this movie won’t tank?

-A movie that has zero chance of tanking is Iron Man 3 (it’s already made $195 million overseas). I saw it last night and it was great. (If I have time I’ll try to post a review later in the week). And you know what I liked most about it? Gwyneth Paltrow. I KNOW! Trust me, you’re going to feel the same way. You might want to prepare yourself with Vulture’s Practical Guide to Not Hating Gwyneth in Iron Man 3, though.

-Meanwhile, Gwyneth recommends ending fights with blowjobs. Yup, that should do it.

-I love that Vulture introduced Mark Ruffalo to the homo-erotic “Science Bros” Internet fan art of him with Robert Downey Jr — and I love his reaction.

Rumer Willis and Demi Moore appear to have ended their feud — with yoga.

Rebel Wilson broke out some improv dance moves on Fallon last night. I feel like “I’m holding too much eye contact while thrusting” will soon be sweeping the clubs.

-Whelp! Lindsay Lohan may start a blog about her 90-day stint in rehab.

-It’s a long one, but you should try to carve a few minutes out of your day to read the transcript of Steven Soderbergh‘s impassioned ‘state of cinema’ speech, which he gave at the San Francisco Film Festival. “Now I’m going to attempt to show how a certain kind of rodent might be smarter than a studio when it comes to picking projects.”

-This is kind of awesome: Geri Halliwell and Mel B were hanging out at an pub when Mel dared Geri to serenade a group of strangers with a Spice Girls song.

-In other ‘former coworkers hanging out’ news, Courteney Cox and Lisa Kudrow ran into each other at an art show.

Kim Kardashian is asking for donations to a children’s hospital in lieu of baby gifts, which is nice and selfless and my world no longer makes sense.

-I haven’t watched Rectify, but I do appreciate their use of Cracker‘s “Low” in this scene.

-Are Jennifer Lawrence and Nicholas Hoult back together? The exes were photographed grabbing dinner last night.

-At last week’s Calgary Comic Expo, Will Wheaton gave an impromptu, awesome speech about the joys of being a nerd.

-Speaking of nerds who rule the world, Chris Hardwick just landed another(!) TV show.

Amanda Bynes has reportedly demanded full access to all of the money that had previously been invested on her behalf. This can’t end well.

-Oh, and now Amanda Bynes is hate-Tweeting at Drake.

-Speaking of Drake, Rihanna followed him on Instagram, which quickly led to Chris Brown unfollowing her. Dramaz!

-Meanwhile, is Chris begging Rihanna to take him back on his new song?

Tom Hanks leads Tony nominations, but Scarlett Johansson got snubbed.

Catherine Zeta-Jones has returned to a facility to treat her bipolar II disorder. According to sources, it was planned.

-Is someone pregnant on Parks and Recreation? My guess in April.

Anne Hathaway was so desperate to escape the paparazzi at LAX, she hung out in a stranger’s car until hers arrived.

-Is Kiera Knightley getting married in France this weekend?

Hilary Duff is guest-starring on Two and a Half Men. That explains her expression.

-This is cool. H&M just put a plus sized model on their homepage like it was ain’t no thang.

-The creator of Breaking Bad says the finale will be “victorious.” We’re guessing not for Walt, though.

Carey Mulligan looks lovely on the cover the June issue of Harper’s Bazaar UK.

-Man, I can’t even remember the last time I saw a photo of Johnny Depp without all the scarves and jewelry. I missed his face!

-The cast of Arrested Development converged on the red carpet last night, and the most hilarious coverage of it came from the show’s official Twitter feed.

-The finale Fast & Furious 6 trailer has landed. So…yeah.

Amy Poehler Responds to Taylor Swift’s Suggestion She’s Going To Hell

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Taylor Swift covers the April 2013 issue of Vanity Fair. (Photo: Peter Lindbergh/Vanity Fair)

-In her new cover story in Vanity Fair, Taylor Swift says Tina Fey and Amy Poehler mean girl’d her at the Golden Globes and quotes Katie Couric by saying, “There’s a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.” Oh yes. Let’s have the girl who makes millions off her failed romances preach feminism to the creators of “bitch is the new black” and Smart Girls at the Party.

Amy Poehler has already responded in the classy, funny way you’d expect.

-Also, Taylor didn’t bad-mouth Harry Styles in VF, but she had no issues “authorizing” one of her friends to publicly accuse him of cheating on her. Who’s acting like a mean girl now?

-Meanwhile, Ed Sheeran insists he’s not dating Taylor.

-Is it just me, or is Kate Winslet Benjamin Button-ing before our eyes? Dayum, girl!

-Are Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux getting hitched in Hawaii in a few weeks?

-Speaking of Justin Theroux, who knew he had a hot brother?

-Just in case you weren’t already in love with Mila Kunis, check out how she handled a petrified interviewer in this video. (My favourite part is when she says “let me just give you answers that I know you’re going to ask” and then just rattles off a bunch of canned, scripted responses before going back to talking about drinking.) I really feel that her, Emma Stone and Jennifer Lawrence need to form a girl gang.

-Speaking of Emma Stone, she’ll join Michael Keaton, Zach Galifianakis and Naomi Watts in a dark comedy called Birdman.

-This Funny or Die video about Postal Service auditions slayed me.

-Nooo! We heard the rumblings, and now it seems like cute Canadian couple Jay Baruchel and Alison Pill really are no more. They were fine a few months ago, judging by their adorable Christmas video.

Jamie Lee Curtis was no fan of Seth MacFarlane‘s sexist Oscar bits. Ditto for Geena Davis.

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are able to hang together at their son’s soccer game without killing each other.

-I scored way too high on this “How Well Do You Know Gilmore Girls?” quiz.

Ellen DeGeneres wrote an open letter about marriage equality to the Supreme Court and it’s awesome.

Justin Bieber offered a weak-ass apology for showing up to a concert two hours late. He’s going to perform tonight’s show 30 minutes early, which I’m sure will thrill last night’s crowd.

-Oh god, are we all supposed to start wearing double jeans like Rihanna now? Because shopping for just one pair already makes me break out in hives.

-This video of a six-year-old girl from London killing it in a breakdance battle made my day.

-People are talking about how Kate Middleton‘s baby bump seems to have disappeared. Uh-oh. It’s Beyonce’s belly watch all over again!

-If last year was the year I discovered podcasts, 2013 is shaping up to be the year I discovered web series. Now that The Lizzie Bennet Diaries is wrapping up (only 7 more eps left!), I’m moving on to Squaresville and Blue (Julia Stiles plays a prostitute!). And I’m going to watch the hell out of Joan Rivers’ web series in which she interviews celebs in bed. Seriously, YouTube shows are becoming better than most of the crap being churned out by network TV.

-Everyone’s talking about Liam Hemsworth getting flirty with January Jones during an Oscars party, but how come this is the first we’ve heard of him cozying up to Emma Watson?

Terrence Howard continues to be creepy, this time praising costar Oprah’s “tig ol’ bitties.” He also says Iron Man killed his career.

-Showtime has confirmed that the next season of Dexter will be its last. I dropped that show a long time ago but heard it bounced back last season. Should I tune in again?

-Wanna see Kanye West grab Kim Kardashian’s boob? Yeah, me neither.

Carly Rae Jepsen and Train just dropped out of the Boy Scout Jamboree, citing the organization’s opposition to gay scouts.

Kate Hudson shows off her abs by posing topless on the cover of Glamour. Exactly what is she promoting (besides her post-baby boobs)? IMDB says she’s not appearing in anything until 2014.

Jon Stewart is taking the summer off to make a movie about Iran. John Oliver will replace him.

-Weird: The X Files lives on. Season 10 will be told in comic book form (though seeing as I’m still trying to repress the fact that the show ended with Scully giving her baby up for adoption and going on the run with a fugitive Mulder, I think I’m just going to keep on pretending the series wrapped after the first movie).

-The trailer for Noah Baumbach‘s Frances Ha has dropped. I saw this at TIFF and it was less than awesome. Unless you enjoy movies where every character acts like they’re auditioning for Girls and they make observations like “This apartment is so aware of itself,” stay away!

-The second official trailer for Iron Man 3 has landed, which beefs up Ben Kingsley‘s role as The Mandarin.