Amber Heard and Johnny Depp Reach Settlement

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Johnny Depp and Amber Heard have reportedly reached a $7 million divorce settlement out of court. It’s much more than she was originally asking for, but considering all the shit that was released this week, it makes sense that he’d pay what he needed to make this go away quickly. Their joint statement is pretty telling, too.

-Meanwhile, Amber‘s camp is denying rumours she had an affair with Billy Bob Thorton. Cause, you know, THAT was the most interesting tidbit to come out of the story about Depp cutting his finger and smearing the wall with blood in front of her.

-Pour one out for Justin Bieber‘s Instagram account, which he shut down following all that poo volleying between him and Selena Gomez.

-There’s lots more reaction to Nate Parker‘s interview about his 1999 sexual assault charge, and how that might affect Birth of a Nation’s upcoming TIFF premiere and its Oscar chances. I’ll tell you this, after reading the call transcript between him and the victim (who falsely claimed to be pregnant, in an attempt to get him to identify the other guy in the room that night), I pretty much have zero desire to support that film. “”I can’t control your drinking…I don’t know exactly how drunk you were.” Horrific.

-Oh god. This story just got a million times worse. The accuser’s brother just revealed that she killed herself in 2012. JFC.

Ellen DeGeneres is defending herself against racism allegations following her Usain Bolt tweet.

-Today’s mantra: Please don’t be Britney. Please don’t be Britney. Please don’t be Britney.

-In happier news, she’s officially confirmed to perform at the VMAs for the first time in nearly 10 years.

Anna Paquin is now set star in CBC’s adaptation of Margaret Atwood’s Alias Grace, written and produce by Sarah Polley. I’m going to try to repress my angsty 12th grader hatred of that book and watch this thing.

-Netflix’s boss says he decided to release Gilmore Girls all at once instead of the staggered type of release they’re trying with shows like The Get Down because “I’m petrified of those fans.” Makes sense.

Robert Downey Jr and Nic Pizzolatto are eyeing a TV show at HBO. The project may be based on Downey’s long-gestating Perry Mason reboot, but I want RDJ to stay away from Nic’s True Detective-ness.

Lin-Manuel Miranda has signed up for Disney’s live-action Little Mermaid, while Keira Knightley will be a sugarplum fairy in the live-action Nutcracker.

-God, I love this Winona Ryder magazine cover.

Caitlyn Jenner‘s E! show I Am Cait has been cancelled after two seasons.

John Krasinski has just signed on as the TV action hero in Amazon’s Jack Ryan series.

-Speaking of John, I spent more time at the Sicario screening last year trying to sneak glimpses of him in the row in front of me than watching the actual movie, which means I should probably not try to get tickets for Denis Villeneuve‘s latest film. The full trailer looks good, though.

Jen McDonnell is an entertainment freelancer and social media specialist. She put her celeb stalking skills to good use as managing editor of www.dose.ca. Likes: pop culture, celebrity dirt, guilty pleasure TV, George Clooney, cheese. Dislikes: people who use 'begs the question' incorrectly. Follow Jen on Twitter @jen_mcdonnell. Follow Jen

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